The Joy of the Internet
by Lichaelle
Summary: Pam is tired of having to deal with Eric and Godric acting like lovesick teenagers. Oneshot, rather obviously slash.


This was a present for Ethrosdemon in the 2009 yuletide fic swap. Many thanks to by awesome beta Deense!

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"… and I'd recommend putting this portion into commodities or bonds, but if you'd rather go the with stocks instead I'm sure we could manage that as well." Pam said, while rapping her pen against her paper.

"Mmm."

Pam glanced at Eric. The two sat on a red velvet loveseat in the back of Fangtasia, the table in front of them heaped with paperwork. Because the bar was closed for Christmas, the lights were dim and the speakers silent.

"Eric?" she prodded again. She'd be insane to say he was good with numbers, but he usually at least pretended to pay attention.

He didn't answer. Pam muttered a curse in Swedish and slapped her sheaf of papers onto the table. With narrowed eyes, she followed her maker's gaze to the shadowy figure leaning against the door.

"Godric. Nice of you to stop by."

He favored her with a smile and inclined his head. "A pleasure as always, Pam."

She replied with a curt nod. She knew how this was going to turn out.

The older vampire grinned conspiratorially at her and turned to face Eric. "My apologies," he murmured. "I had meant to arrive in time for the solstice but the weather was troublesome. I hope you aren't overly angry with me."

"Godric." Eric whispered. He rose in a split second and moved to embrace his maker. The two of stood there for a time, silhouetted like statues in the dim red lights of the bar.

Pam threw her head back and fought the urge to roll her eyes. Now they were never going to get any work done.

As if to prove her right, Eric spoke without looking away from Godric. "Pam, I trust you will be able to take whatever pecuniary measures you see fit. I wish to be undisturbed for the remainder of the evening. Good night." And with that the two vampires sauntered into his private study, whispering quietly to each other as they went. The door swung shut behind them and Pam heard the faint sound of a lock engaging.

She stared at the door for a while, chewing absentmindedly on her pen. Honestly.

When the TV show based on them had started airing, she was quite sure Godric had been the most amused of all of them. The last time he had been at Fangtasia the three of them had watched the episode in which he had "died," laughing the entire time. Of course he'd meant it to look like he died and he was smart enough that it would've been insulting if the humans had seen through it. Still, the whole idea was ludicrous. Eric never would've allowed it, for one.

She shook her head, and began cleaning up the sundry billing records and tax returns on the table. Eric, for all his power and age, would be as lost as a newborn lamb without his maker.

But of course, killing off Godric wasn't the only inaccuracy perpetuated by the show. She considered the locked door again, and Eric's embrace. A faint smirk hovered on her lips. They'd left that part out also.

A crash from the next room broke her out of her reverie. Pam winced. She was almost sure that was the sound of Eric's desk breaking. What the hell were they doing in there anyway? He had better not ask her to clean up the wreckage the next morning. Oh, he had better not.

To hell with the paperwork, she decided abruptly. She pushed the papers into a rough pile, and stood up, stretching. If Eric complained she'd just tell him she hadn't been able to concentrate with the cacophony he and Godric were making. She stifled a laugh. Christ, were those _moans_?

She sauntered over to the other side of the room, and booted up her computer. If they could have fun, so could she. And there was no risk of them finding out, she thought wickedly. She'd tried to teach Eric how to use a computer a few years ago. It hadn't gone well for him or the machine. He had ended up destroying her last computer in a fit of rage after spending three and a half hours trying to turn it on. And if anyone had told Godric what a computer was, much less how to use one, it was news to her.

She clicked on the start menu, and opened firefox. While waiting for the browser to load, she glanced back at the closed door one last time. If Eric found out about this, she would be in deep shit.

On the other hand, the opportunity was too perfect to pass up on. She entered the address for her livejournal, keyed in her username and password, and began to type.

_Dangerous Passion, part XVII by ScarletTemptress789_

_ The second Eric closed the door, his maker was on him. He let out a moan as Godric kissed his neck, his desire pouring into each lick of his tongue. Eric panted as he ripped at his maker's shirt, desperate to touch and taste his milky skin. Godric let out a growl, and slammed their bodies together, causing delicious friction in all the right places. Eric felt heat pooling in his stomach. "Oh…god," he moaned. "You're so fucking-"_

_ Godric silenced him with another kiss, this time a violent study of his mouth. The heat in of Godric's tongue left nothing in his head but a smoky desire. And then Godric flipped Eric onto his back, like he weighed nothing at all. Eric dimly heard the crunch of his desk beneath him, but compared to the heat of Godric's mouth threatening to consume him it barely registered. The two scrambled to tear away each other's clothes, stealing kisses and bits of precious friction as they did so._

Pam saved her work and microwaved a bottle of true blood. Sipping it delicately, she sat down to continue writing. She chuckled quietly, thinking about the thirty six reviews she'd received on the last chapter.

God, she loved the internet.


End file.
